Recently, my friend forwarded to me this site, “http://www.43things.com“ This is a community site where you can list what you want/need to do. A quite interesting concept I would say…Anyway, there is a section where they list 20 most popular users to do list by cities. By curiosity, I’ve clicked on New York City. The number 1 was “Moving Out of NYC” and number 12 was “Leaving New York” Which made me smile and nod.
For New Yorkers, leaving New York means a major adjustment of lifestyle but, also means opportunity to live in a more sensible environment with lower living cost. Lately, it has been a topic of conversation among my friends here. I think it’s because of our ages. When we moved to NYC when we were in early 20s(I was 18,) at that age, New York was exciting and inspiring that we’ve been living here feeding off New York’s great atomosphere. Now, we 30 something working professionals all feel as if NYC is feeding off us as a decade passed. What it used to be a great club scene or good art scene seems repetitive and meaningless to us lately. It’s like the most of things have become done-that, been-there. I have lived in NYC for 16 years now and so are some of my close friends so I guess it’s not coinscidence that we often talking about leaving NYC.
After dozen years of paying most of your salary into rents and dinners, you cannot help wondering what am I getting for all this high expenses. Life in NYC doesn’t seem glamorous anymore. I actually do have some friends who acted more than just talking about it like others including me. They have moved to CA, Europe and etc. The dilemma we lefters often feel is that we really don’t know where to move to other than New York. The change would be very significant outside of New York City. Also, for many people it means settling down and having a family. Because if you think about it, NYC is the city of singles. Everything is designed for single’s life style. If you are going to outside of New York where less singles live and less things to do or places to go other than family activities, you will need somebody to share new lifestyle with. That is why very often we see that married couples move out of NYC like they all promised.
Some move to outside of the US, they seek for cities that is like New York, such as London, Tokyo, Paris, Montreal and etc. I guess it’s very difficult to absorb all this active New York life style more than ten years. Even to live over 10 years, New Yorkers have to constantly look for breaks outside of NYC in order to be sane. We don’t know why we have to work 12 hours a day and we don’t know why we all have to rush every second. For what?
I think I’m aware that I’m due for leaving New York City soon regardless of being a single or not, even if I would come back in few years. I don’t know where I could go or where to explore new life style yet but, I know that I will have to follow my heart.
Looking @ Reflection 
July 27, 2006 at 11:59 am
I’ve been in New York since 1996 and have thoroughly enjoyed the city immensely. Although it’s been wonderful, I am getting restless concerning the lack of freedom. Although I enjoy the great restaurants and bars-Im tired of the routine of working and going out. Any other activity, whether it’s going to the beach, out in the country, riding a horse or whatever, although possible, cannot be integrated into one’s everyday life. I want to move, but am scared that I’ll miss the level of sophistication. New York spoils you, but Im not sure if it’s entirely all good or for the right reasons.
July 27, 2006 at 12:00 pm
leaving new york
August 1, 2006 at 1:58 pm
Reading this post reminds me of my exodus from NYC almost 4 years ago. I am one of those individuals who decided to move because the cost of raising my son in NYC was prohibitive (he was born in Brooklyn and we lived in Williamsburg for the first year of his life, but a 4 floor walk-up, to a 2 bedroom apartment on South Bedford Ave. was not our idea of a child-friendly environment). So, after getting laid off from my NYC dot com job in 2002, we moved to Philly (my wife is a philly girl).
It was a change, even though Philly is a large and vibrant city as opposed to some podunk town. I guess, after 10 years, NYC was in my blood but after about 2 weeks I really settled in and started enjoying a more manageable life.
Do I miss the bars, and the club scene? Nope..they were a part of my life when I was in my 20s. What about the “culture”? Well, fortunately Philly is very cultured, great museums, galleries, art scene, etc.
I have realized that after living in NYC for a long period of time, you start thinking that unless life is annoyingly difficult (i.e. unless all your $$ goes to rent a cramped apartment, and you are rushing everywhere all the time, etc) you must not be “living”. Moving from NYC will require a decompression period, but hang in there. NYC will always stay with you (I still walk, talk and drive like a New Yorker, much to the chagrin of my fellow Philadelphians 😉
August 5, 2006 at 1:36 am
Thanks for comments and good stories. If I ever decided to move out of NYC and actually did, I will definitely write about it.
Like jmp’s story, I think it would be easier for me to move out of NYC if I move out to another city with my significant other to start a new lifestyle. It’s a definitely easier transition to move out of New York City as a couple – especially, a family with a kid, which seems natural at some point. Maybe it’s another reason why so many singles live in NYC. Singles like to hang out with other singles most of time and therefore they tend to live in the cities with higher single populations.(I managed to repeat singles four times in this one sentence) Well, I do have many handful friends who are married with kids here in NYC although I’m a single but, most of them are out of Manhattan. No surprise.
November 25, 2007 at 1:48 am
[…] once wrote a post, Moving Out of NYC a while back in last summer, which means that after living in NYC for over 17 years, I finally felt […]
November 1, 2010 at 1:08 am
our family activities are mostly related to leisure and running of family business .
December 1, 2010 at 6:47 pm
family activities are very nice to have, it also strengthens the bond among family members “*-
January 25, 2011 at 11:30 am
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May 27, 2012 at 9:19 am
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